Need some FUN RIGHT NOW!!!

So I am now ready for a fling, an affair, to meet the love of my love, have some FUN, someone to look after me. Nicole Kidman, big movie star with all kinds of security around her actually said: "I like a relationship with a strong man. I need protection." Well heck, so do I. I need a person, no a BUNCH of people, in my life RIGHT NOW to look after me, fight the bullies, stand up for me, speak up for me, protect me. Really, I think we all do. We need connection, love, people to look out for us. We need to look out for each other. Take time to take care. Spend less time on TV and internet games and shopping and spacing out and more time connecting, helping, loving. I've been through a REALLY rough 6 months. It began with a crazy crazy crazy ex-roommate, a true psychopath, smiling through her hidden evil plans. She moved out and I breathed a sigh of relief, but the "fun" had only just begun. She pulled all KINDS of crap, amazing crap. I won't go into it all now...maybe later. But I have been left having to run around cleaning up messes, stand up to bullies, fight back against threats and intimidation and betrayals, over and over again in the past 6 months. Unreal. Un fricking real. I hope to hell I am learning something through these trials and tribulations. I sure as hell hope so. I think of Bradley Manning and I am so inspired and saddened, angry and amazed. How has he kept his sanity through 1000 days of bullying, isolation, extreme injustice? I hope one day I can meet him in person and thank him for his service to humanity, in simply trying to reveal the truth. He is a true hero. Thanks Bradley.

Sometimes Men Can Be Really Nice

So just when I am feeling "God! Men are annoying!" with a passion I've rarely felt (hah! more like felt every day for most of my life..) a few men suddenly are nice to me.

(Just to clarify, in this case, "annoying" ranges from general daily annoyance at pervasive sexism to downright rage at boys who think it might be kinda neat to kill a bunch of Pakistani mountain dwellers with evil drones, and then simply go "oops" when it turns out these civilians had NOTHING to do with ANY threat to anyone, but were in fact a bunch of women and children at a birthday party.) But for now, back to the "nice" part.

A guy in the liquor store tells me I should DEFINITELY drink a little of the beer I bought to cook with, Duchesse De Bourgogne. I don't usually drink at all, but I decided to try the beer, while making my beer stew. Wow. Amazing. It doesn't even really taste like beer, but more like a fizzy drink with delicious herbs. So now if I ever DO feel like drinking a beer, I know what to buy. Thanks, liquor store guy.

A man at Starbucks warns me that if I drink strong tea, it will keep me from sleeping. Of course he's right, I stay up researching "researchers" i.e. surveillers. Did you know that the NSA sponsors programs at a BUNCH of different colleges to TRAIN people to spy on their fellow Americans. Truly, in the spirit of the First Amendment (and a few others), this is disgusting. What a horrible career. If the U.S. really wanted to make its citizens safer, it would take steps to become a less-hated entity in the world. For example, how about NOT invading any more sovereign nations to steal their oil, or other resources?

A male civil servant I speak to on the phone ends up being one of the MOST informed and kind people I have ever talked to, and this after having spoken first to two really awful, really MEAN women.

A manager at Shaw's market apologetically refunds my $1.72 after discovering that the tomatoes I bought were incorrectly priced in the system. I wasn't expecting that at all.

A high school friend sends me a wonderful diatribe I wrote at the age of 17. Maybe I will post it on my blog. Although times have changed. No one paid any attention to my teenage rantings, but I have a feeling a 2010 teen might get into a lot of trouble for similar expression in these paranoid, "got to control everything" times.

Two male musicians for whom I wrote a brief review both responded with really nice thank-yous, even though my review was sort of a back-handed compliment. I was actually complaining about the Musicians' Boys Club, and how LOOONNNNGGGG it seems to be taking to get bands integrated with women (think about doctors--not long ago they were all men, and now, more than 50% are female). But I do like these bands, even if they consist of the "Wall of Men" as I think of it. Good musicians, and fun to dance to. So, thank you for the thank yous.

It just made me think today. Some men DO want to give, share, nurture, be kind, show compassion. They just get overrun by the insane psycho bullies of the world, who only enjoy power trips and destruction. Time to speak up and tell the bullies to SHUT UP, sit down and take a deep breath. Time to change. Believe me, you bullies will feel better once you get through your own anxiety, sadness and grief. And so will the rest of us.