Thursday, February 19, 2009

Condom Companies Should Pay, Not Me!

I hate anti-abortionists. I just had one sitting next to me in this coffee shop. After listening to her blow hot air for 45 minutes, blithely spewing how SHE would simply HAVE the baby, and go to grad school at Harvard anyway, how people who make mistakes should PAY, well, I just couldn't take it any more.

I stood up, on my way to get a 6 inch chicken submarine for supper, and I said, "I've done both, had a kid young, and had an abortion. And what I want to know is, where were all these "save the baby" people after she was born?"

That's right, not ONE of those hypocrites ever showed up at my door to say, "Good for you, you struggling, poverty-stricken single Mom! You kept those cells intact and had a baby without ANY resources to care for her. Well, let ME pay for those diapers, those school fees, her winter boots, her college tuition." Empathy for a group of cells is only good until the cells actually evolve from an embryo to a full-fledged human being. Then, it seems, the empathy and concern go out the window.

Why should I, and some human being who had NOTHING to do with anything, pay for a broken condom with a life of poverty--a child who will spend more time with babysitters than her mother, every heart's desire either impossible, or unbelievably difficult to realize? Give me a break! I didn't make that condom, and I WAS being responsible, using it. So I should pay for the poor quality plastic, the condom companies cutting corners, by being forced to raise a child?

The only people who really suffer from the efforts of the anti-abortionists are poor young women, often black or Latino, who don't have the means to fly up to Canada or New York city. Any comfy suburban girl will always have a choice, at least financially. So what is the idea here? That if you are poor and your boyfriend pressures you for unprotected sex to prove you love him, and you are only 15 or 16 and don't see this for the ruse it is, that you should PAY for your youth, your silly young heart, for affection from a ruthless boy who doesn't even love you, by being forced into a life of unbelievable hardship?

It is not easy being poor. I daresay most of the people screaming "Don't Kill the Baby" at Planned Parenthood have no idea of the hardship of simply being poor, never mind being poor and alone with a baby, child, teenager. In fact, most of the people I saw screaming at Planned Parenthood were 60 year old men, who will NEVER have any idea what it is like to go through such a painful decision and a difficult life.

I suggested to the young woman that she start by becoming a full-time nanny, and then try to imagine caring for these children with NO money, NO education, NO resources, NO help, and NO maturity. Then head on down to Downtown Crossing, Boston, and take a gander at the 15 year olds screaming at their kids, and try to convince yourself that this is the wonderful suburban outcome you imagine when you sit there judging people who had no other sin than to use an imperfect condom, listen to an abusive boyfriend, or maybe get drunk one night.

Man! Anti-abortionists are among the least compassionate people on the face of this earth.

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